Are you playing your position?!
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Are you playing your position?!
Well, well, well...long time no read!
If you’d rather listen to this week’s edition of “But Yea…”, listen to it here!
Girl, the last time we talked, I was having the time of my life plus I was grieving my old self. I had to literally scratch everything I thought my life was going to be like. Which made it hard for me to show up online because the emotional turmoil was INSANITY! I prayed to God for less chaos & he was like “let’s get triggered BABY!” But yea…here we are about 6 months since my last email & girl do we have a lot to chat about.
I feel like a little theme song should go here…
Every week I will share an adventure, discovery, or experiment I’ve tried & let you know how it went. A lot of adulting is trial & error and I have found a passion for sharing those trials in hopes that it’ll help, inspire, or whatever you in your journey to trynna be grown.
This week I wanted to talk about the time I have had “playing my position”…
So when I started praying for a less chaotic Bria this was earlier in 2022. I just wanted my job to be less chaotic in hopes that life would soon follow the less chaotic route too. One thing to note about God, he don’t do nothing small. (I hope you read that in my voice lol) I feel like as soon as I left my job, life got wild!
I was having the time of my life never being home (shoutout to Bri’s World Tour 2022), started 2 new jobs within like 4 months' time & started talking to this guy. He was great but it was so great at first that it triggered me AT EVERY WAKING MOMENT!
Thank God for therapy & rational friends I was able to work through things with them and a professional but also I had to figure out why I was triggered. This was really challenging everything I thought I knew about myself, God put in me to put on my vision board about being in a relationship but I didn’t get it nor did I fully understand that Old Bria aka Bria 1.5 couldn’t go. I mean I was thinking I’m in therapy so it’s giving healed…SIKE! lol Bria 1.5 was fighting for her life while Bria 2.0 is like “Girl we trynna get in position”. I would describe Bria. 2.0 is softer but still gotta little bite, me & my therapist came up with the name “soft thug”.
So I’m like okay cool, imma Soft Thug (baby cause imma thug), I’m having a blast but bruh no one tells you that you get to a point in dating where things are great but it still triggers you SO BAD. Lucky for me I already knew the root of my triggers, it’s ✨ DADDY ISSUES ✨ & in order for me to get into the position I had to address him/the issues. GIRRRRLLL like Lord we can’t just make this work without doing that?! He was like nah not unless you wanna be in the airport crying out your eyeballs because he ain’t you up yet to make sure you good even though you know he will later. (true story…) I was like cool let’s do it, I sat with my dad we talked and came to an understanding (at least for that time).
Fast forward to the New Year, things go from chill to crazy (0 to 100); I had to set some new boundaries for myself & with friends, February the whole month had me in my feelings DAILY cause Bria 1.5 is fighting for her life. The dude goes away, things change & we get to the end of March. I’m like dang life is boring!
After reflection, I had to come to the conclusion oh it’s cause we finally made it to “Less Chaotic Bria aka Bria 2.0” but we ain’t been playing/living in that position. Even writing this, I’m like taking myself out cause not I read myself…
For the last few weeks, I have fully played in my position. We not rushing, we chilling on the couch messing up art projects while watching Shrek, we’re opening PR packages, we letting dudes talk to us nice (everyone likes a little hype) & we know we’re a good partner to someone cause DUH! I call it making delusion a reality.
So my question to you this week is, “Are you playing your position?!” That’s all God is asking us to do, to get in a position to receive the blessings he has for us but when you get to that point/position, are you playing your part or nah?! or are you playing last year’s game?!
Hopefully, that resonates with you in some way or save it for later when you need it! Even share it with someone who could use the encouragement!
I made you playlist boo! I am ready for the summer & I know you are too so here’s a summer vibes playlist to get you ready! Here’s the link for the spotify gurls!
I hope you enjoyed this week’s edition of the newsletter, every week won’t be this long but I wanted to catch you up! If you loved it, leave a comment! So, same time next week?! BET!