You're Worth It... Period!
13th Edition of But Yea...
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Hey Boos!
I was writing this week’s edition as I was literally in the thick of it. I didn’t realize until starting therapy almost 4 years ago that I struggled with my self-worth. This leo here struggling with believing she’s the prize?! Cray right?! But Yea… this one is a self realization that I know once it’s published it’ll all have come together!
As I sit here writing this I am about to go on a trip sponsored by job, my first work trip and I am currently having a pretty healthy time in my dating journey. Things are great as they should be because I deserve it but can’t help but to feel like I’m going to get caught in something.
I have struggled in the past with remembering how worthy I am of nice/great things. Most times in the past I would instantly jump to the worst case. I’m not sure what triggers my mind to feel like I can’t handle good things. (We haven’t gotten to that breakthrough in therapy yet)
Even with my car! Every time I take it in for the routine maintenance I brace myself. Something triggers my brain to make me feel like I don’t take care of my car. Every time it has good check marks and even the things I ask them to look at aren’t things to worry about. Do you know how crazy it is to consistently feel like you’re doing something wrong & you’re gonna get caught?! Anxiety is part of this as well but it’s insane! Even though I have some much love and reassurance around me, my mind can’t help but fixate on what’s not happening right.
I am constantly working on rerouting my thoughts. My mind often can be compared to a construction site. Lots of deep work to reconstruct and lots of detours!! I now understand why Mary Jane from “Being Mary Jane” kept up all those sticky notes everywhere of reminders! (Although she is a lot more unhinged than I) I haven’t been posting sticky notes but here are some reminders I constantly recite to myself:
You Deserve This!
Enjoy the Moment! You are the Moment!
Everyday It Gets Better!
Everything I Want, Wants Me!
You’re Safe!
You’re Brilliant!
You’re Doing Great!
You are Deserving of Consistent Love, Adoration & Affection!
You Didn’t Do Anything Wrong!
They Love You for You! Not Just What You Do!
Boy this lesson has been such a huge thing for me as life continues to progress! God has put some big visions in me that I know it’s going to take this work to get me there. Dettaching my work from my worth, being consistently vulnerable and having patience with myself when things continue to trigger me. These big 3 are the foundation for what I would call a hostile takeover! My life is becoming way different and better than what I could even imagine for myself. I am thankful in advance!
Does any of this resonate with you?! If so, share your reminders to yourself below!
As y’all know I am prepping for the New Year now as far as mindset, routines & etc! Last year I used a workbook to begin this work and it helped me a lot! I am starting this week on the reflection portion and I wanted to invite you to start working on yours too! It’s called “Year Compass“ & I saw it on one of my favorite tiktokers page. It has a section to reflect on the past year, one of the questions is “A book or movie was made about your past year. What title would you give it?”. My answer was “Pride, Audacity & Tequila”. If you need context to some of that just visit my earlier editions of the newsletter! Lastly, it has a section to look at the year ahead. They suggest you do these in separate moments which I found very helpful. As I read back over what I hoped for 2023, I wrote “I want to be more vulnerable”!! How crazy is that?! The one for this year hasn’t dropped yet but you can check out last year’s booklet here to get a feel for the process & learn more! It’s completely FREE! I’m going to start now while I wait for the new one to drop by recapping each month of my year! Join me!!
This week we got a bit deep! I’m so excited for this new month of editions plus I’m working to make the podcast a bit more official for next year so stay tuned girl! Talk soon!